Anger and frustration are universal human emotions, but that doesn’t mean you have to be a victim of negative feelings. As adults, we have an obligation to our family and ourselves to avoid allowing our emotions to get the best of us. Let’s face it. Being a parent is tough. When you want a peaceful time in the bathroom for more than two minutes without hearing little footsteps outside the curtain, it can be incredibly frustrating. Or, when you’ve told your child for the gazillionth time to turn off the light when they leave a room, it can make you want to pull your hair out.
One way that many different parents express their anger and frustration is by yelling at their kids. It’s not because they want to necessarily, but because sometimes they get so overwhelmed, they lose control. Other times it may just be easier to holler than to learn strategies to become a calmer parent.
There are many responses you can choose when faced with a situation that makes your blood boil. Finding peace is possible! Learn to manage your anger and arrive at a peaceful solution using these strategies.
1. Think About The Consequences
It’s tempting to run with your exasperation in the short term, but giving in to rage can cause even more challenges. Before lashing out at your kids or taking what you consider appropriate actions, consider how things will be when the smoke clears.
2. Self Reflect
Did someone physically harm you? Did they let you down? Violate one of your values? Figure out why you’re frustrated, and you’ll be able to take the necessary steps to discover a solution.
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3. Play
Starting a tickle war, making silly faces, and laughing it off help change the entire mood of the house. Not only do you calm down, but you get your kids’ attention, and it’s just another great way to connect with them. The power of play is solid and real. I dare you to try this and see for yourself.
4. Get it out
When our emotions bubble up, sometimes the best thing we can do is get it out. Go outside and scream, and if you feel like you need to scream at your kids, scream, “I LOVE YOU!” Those three words will remind you that you do love your kids, even when you’re angry. Once you get that initial burst of anger out, it’s time to focus and re-access the situation. Going into ranting and raving isn’t always all that helpful, but you can talk it out.
5. Look For Solutions
Acting in anger is about making yourself feel better. Rather than yelling at your kids, for instance, work on finding a peaceful solution. The outcome will be much better and well worth your time.
6. Practice Relaxation Techniques
The more relaxed you are regularly as a parent, the less likely you are to become angry. Relaxation techniques can also be helpful after the fact. Learn how to self-soothe. It’s a skill that can be learned.
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7. Move
Moving our bodies is a great way to get out some of that anger. Whether cleaning your house, going for a walk, or shaking it off, the physical movement gets out some of that pent-up aggression in healthy ways. This can help deal with some of that emotional flooding we feel when we get angry. It helps bring your brain functioning to a place of logic instead of its primal emotional place. Plus, exercise releases feel-good endorphins into your body and is an instant mood lifter.
8. Focus On The Big Picture
Imagine that you knew the world would come to an end next Friday. Would you be upset if your child didn’t hang his backpack? Of course not.
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